I want to know

I want to know what it would be like

To feel you stand beside me

Have your arm around my shoulders

To hold your hand as we walk

I want to know what it would be like

To be pulled against your chest

Enclosed in your arms

To hear your heartbeat against my ear

 

I want to know what it would be like

To feel your breath on my neck

The air against my skin where your hand just left

The space between our lips before they meet

I want to know what it would be like

To feel your face beneath my hands

The texture of your lips, to trace

The line of your jaw with my fingertips

 

I want to know what it would be like

To run my hand down the curve of your back

To lay my head between your shoulder blades

To kiss your skin with my eyelashes

I want to know what it would be like

If you pulled my hair back

Opened my mouth with yours

Let your tongue create a new dance with mine

 

I want to know what it would be like

If, when we kiss, the stars explode

If the earth stops turning

If time stands still

I want to know what it would be like

For you to cup my breasts

Like sacred things

And rest your head between them

 

I want to know what it would be like

To be tangled up together

Hot, salty, sated,

Drunk on each other

I want to know what it would be like

To feel your weight on me

Pressing me down

Inviting me to surrender

 

I want to know what it would be like

To see you so turned on you lose control

Fall into the abyss of death

To wake again in my arms

I want to know what it would be like

To take you in my mouth

And let you feed me

To drown in you, completely

 

I want to know what it would be like

To wake up to your kisses on my thigh

The soft melting when I invite you inside

The sweet agony of unleashed desire

I want to know what it would be like

When we sleep side by side

If my dreams would be sweeter

And my waking gentler

 

I want to know what it would be like

For you to hold me as I cry

To let me sob and shake and sigh

And know you won’t let go

I want to know what it would be like

To feel your fingertips touch mine

So lightly that a hair could pass between

And the whole universe waits in that moment

 

I want to know what it would be like

To sit around a sacred fire

To sing and dance with God forever

To reach into the flames together

I want to know what it would be like

To wrap my arms around your chest

To press myself against your back

To pretend you’re all I’ll ever need

 

I want to know what it would be like

To release all my longing without you leaving

Without my intensity making you run

To know you will stay, always

I want to know what it would be like

To feel your hand on the small of my back

Guiding me forward, supporting me

Not needing words

 

I want to know what it would be like

To know you so intimately that I know

The pathways your blood takes through your body

The secrets the air takes as it leaves your lungs

I want to know what it would be like

To wind our bodies into one

To bind ourselves together so tightly

That there is no space for air

 

I want to know what it would be like

To speak without words

To know if the silence we share

Has magic in it

I want to know what it would be like

To fall asleep with my head on your chest

To feel the soft rise and fall

Of your precious breath

 

I want to know what it would be like

To look into your eyes forever

To watch you change and grow

And know I’m in there

I want to know what it would be like

To smile and see your eyes light up

To feel you soften under

The warmth of my gaze

 

I want to know what it would be like

If we sit together in silence

To find new layers of meaning

And ask different questions of God

I want to know what it would be like

To whisper a thousand prayers in your ears

To listen with devotion side by side

For answers, as night falls

 

I want to know what it would be like

To see the infinite, the endless, the formless

In the sun’s reflection in your eyes

To fall and lose myself in that

I want to know what it would be like

If you feel like a miracle

When I hold you in my arms

To let go this breath of waiting

 

I want to know

If loving you would make me a better woman

And you a better man

If it would change everything

I want to know

If we are each others’ medicine

If this love could save us both

If it could change the world

I want to know

If I could find God

In the white-hot flame

Of this timeless fire

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